The Day Before Gotcha Day

 

One year ago today, I was filled with anticipation.

At the time, I was dog sitting. It was our last day there, and my husband and I already knew that the very next day, we would be driving to the BCSPCA in Quesnel to meet a beautiful puppy who had travelled all the way from Prince Rupert.

From the moment I saw her picture, I felt she was meant to be mine (and my husband’s of course — but mostly mine, haha).

When we met her outside, she ignored her brother — who really wanted to play — and instead chose cuddles with us. That was it. We knew she was coming home.

Tomorrow marks one year since Chise came home.

A year ago today, we were standing right on the edge of beginning this chapter with her. And in a way, we’re standing in a similar place again now.

Tonight, as I write and schedule this (still in December!), we’re surrounded by boxes — things half-packed, half-cleaned, half-done. The home we brought Chise into feels unfamiliar, and so does my body. We’re tired, stretched thin, and trying to do far too much all at once.

By the time you’re reading this, we’ll be in a brand new place. New home, new surroundings, new sounds, new routines. Everything feeling unfamiliar again as we try to settle, decompress, and find our footing.

And honestly? That feels strangely fitting.

Because when a dog comes home — truly comes home — it’s very rarely perfectly timed. Even with preparation, things get missed. Life keeps happening. Often, dogs come home in the middle of other changes, in moments of uncertainty, when safety is something we are actively building rather than something we already have.

But one thing stays a constant truth. Dogs coming home always marks the beginning of a brand new chapter.

And oh, what a chapter that is.

Chise didn’t arrive into a calm, perfectly settled world, as much as I wish she had. But things were unsettled. We had only recently come home ourselves, things were a mess, and she arrived to us doing the very best we could. She was also coming from a dramatic start to life before us — something she is still recovering from at her own pace.

It was a huge change for all of us. A beautiful one. But there’s something important that often gets overlooked....

Change Is Hard — Even When It’s Good

Positive change is still change, and change is hard.

Both humans and dogs can struggle deeply with it, even when it’s something we want. We grow comfortable in our routines — even imperfect ones — and any disruption can be profoundly dysregulating.

Dogs are no different.

Though both humans and dogs are resilient, positive change can still tax the nervous system in significant ways.

For Chise and me, 2025 has been an incredibly trying year. We’ve navigated financial changes, work changes, health changes — everything felt hard, everything felt like a fight. Even now, as things finally begin to look up, we’re still adjusting.

Moving house. New routines. New smells. Different circumstances.

Even when nothing “bad” is happening, nervous systems notice.

We’re all struggling right now — Chise especially. She has faced many unexpected challenges during her time with us. No one’s fault of course. That's just life.

So if you’re in a similar boat, and your dog seems more sensitive, clingy, reactive, or unsettled, please remember: this isn’t a setback. It’s communication.

And if you feel exhausted, emotional, or like you’re falling behind — that matters too. It deserves care and attention. So please take some time to rest. That’s a lesson I’m still learning for myself. I know it's hard, I'm right there with you.

You Are Not Failing Your Dog

One of the most painful myths guardians carry is the belief that they must be calm, regulated, organised, and on top of everything at all times to be good enough.

But safety isn’t perfection.

Safety is meeting needs to the best of your ability.
It’s choosing kindness even when the world isn’t kind to you.
It’s allowing time to decompress.
It’s responding with empathy instead of resorting to punishment or negativity.

Safety is moving away from things that erode trust and instead choosing the things that build it.

That kindness — offered again and again — is what creates real security.

A Suggestion

If you’re in a season of change, especially one you didn’t choose, here’s a small invitation:

• Slow just one thing down

• Lower one training expectation

• Offer yourself and your dog one extra moment of kindness

If not for me, do it for Chise. She insists on it. 

See?

Tomorrow, my husband and I celebrate one year with Chise. We celebrate that time, not because everything is perfect, but because we kept choosing each other. We kept going through the mess, the exhaustion, and the constant change. And if you need another reason, Gotcha Days are just a beautiful concept. Dogs change our lives for the better, so celebrating them coming into our life is something wonderful and worthwhile. What's even more wonderful is also making that day special for them.

She used to be so little! 

Each year that comes, we will continue choosing each other for as long as we can.

Next time, I’ll share what we got up to on Chise’s Gotcha Day. So be sure to check back for some ideas you can use to celebrate your own dog’s special day too!

Thoughtfully written by Becky Osborne. If you enjoyed this and would like to support me further you can:
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